Faith empowers us to act even when the world tells us to stop. When we listen to world our shield of faith shrinks and cannot protect us. With a shrunken shield, we are less able to demonstrate our faith in our everyday actions.

When I recognize the inner voice that tells me to sabotage a relationship, or warns me to run away from a friendship, I stop the thought and replace it with scripture. Part of the process is identifying when I felt the same emotions or physical sensations

As a survivor of childhood trauma, I struggled for years with the truth found in John’s words. I believed in Jesus, but I wasn’t at all sure He loved me. I spent years bargaining with Him for approval. Every time I broke a promise, I begged for forgiveness, but wasn’t sure how to earn His love. I didn’t realize His love was a gift.

leaving the security of familiar coping mechanisms is terrifying. Especially when nothing seems to ease the fear and pain like what I knew. When the “new life” became difficult or not what I expected, I wanted to return to the comfortable. I wanted what was comfortable even though it was dangerous and painful.

Although the sonnet below is a reflection of my recent journey down memory lane, I think it reflects the healing journey many survivors face as the wrestle with memories, triggers and flashbacks. If this is you, I hope my words bring comfort to your troubled heart and renew your faith that there is hope of redemption because of Jesus Christ. 

leaving the security of familiar coping mechanisms is terrifying. Especially when nothing seems to ease the fear and pain like what I knew. When the “new life” became difficult or not what I expected, I wanted to return to the comfortable. I wanted what was comfortable even though it was dangerous and painful.