I wanted to change, but I felt powerless. How could I change and stop the pattern of behavior that was destroying me?
Fearfully and Wonderfully Made is the second blog of a three-part series. In this blog, I describe how I come face to face with my distorted self-image. I knew the truth, but still felt unlovable. One simple change altered who I saw when I looked in the mirror.
“Over the next few weeks at The Meadows, a treatment center in Arizona, I learned that confession is only one step in the process of letting go of sin.”
describes my inner transformation and tentative acceptance of a different meaning of love.
describes my internal conflict between the truth and a behavior pattern that seems impossible to break.
expresses the distrust, confusion, and hopelessness that often accompanies language distortion of sex and love.
Expresses the distorted connection between love and sexual performance.
Sometimes poetry allows expression of emotion that prose does not allow. Writing these Sonnets helped me connect the thread of how my early experiences affected how I defined love and my relationships with others, with myself and how I interpreted everyday experiences.
As I struggled to comprehend how God could love me, I struggled with an equally troubling question, “How could God love the family members who hurt me?”
As tears rolled down my cheeks as I thought, “How can I ever give her the love she […]